It is early afternoon and I have just left my place of work for the last time. I am a 31 year old computer specialist and I am now walking the half mile up Bergholt Road to my semi-detached house.

My company car sits in the company car park and the keys are with my manager.

The reality is slowly sinking in that I have been made redundant after 10 years, 1 month and 2 days service.

The two consolations are the cheque for 16,263 pounds and the knowledge that the decision to make me redundant has probably significantly increased my life expectancy.

I say this because I am an alcoholic and the amount of alcohol that I am currently drinking is certainly verging on the life threatening. Prior to this event, the only possible method I had to reduce my drinking was to jack the job in. Instead the job has jacked me in. Thank God.

My calculations indicate that after I pay off my debts, the money I've got should last me about six months, especially if I can reduce my alcohol intake, but following that I will be in very real trouble. Maybe by some miracle I can find another job - one must live in hope.

Alcoholism is an almost acceptable form of drug abuse which consumes you physically and mentally until you can no longer find ways to hide your problem. In my case, oblivion was beginning to loom ahead of me but for this most fortunate of misfortunes.

Desperately Seeking Sex & Sobriety - Copyright Paul Pisces 2002-2004

(A Cautionary Tale of Sex Tourism, Drugs, Alcohol, Prostitution & Suicide)

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